full circle

 Photo of me and Jackson, from my first post

Photo of me, Jackson, Walker, and Hazel, taken last week

Today is my 34th birthday.

The past five and a half weeks have been the hardest of my life.
They have also given me things that I would not trade for the world.

I have experienced some pain and suffering, fear and remorse, trial and tribulation, and in exchange I have a new appreciation for my life, my family, my self.

I have been brought to my knees, and have touched a void of hopelessness only to be lifted up by the love of the most amazing children, husband, parents, and friends.

I still have some healing to do, but already I have been given the precious gift of a second chance -- an opportunity to stop marking time, doing what is easy or habitual or safe -- and begin being the person I want to be right now.

Today.

For five years this blog has been a huge part of who I am.  I have learned so much from the experience of authoring Marvelous Kiddo, I have met so many amazing people through it, and I have felt very powerful and creatively fulfilled here.

I have also lost myself in it from time to time: Living life to blog about it later, instead of for the experience itself.  Prioritizing the blog over my family or my marriage or myself sometimes (ok, many times).  Getting bogged down by comparing myself to others. Trying to earn the approval of strangers.  Striving to keep up with the ever-increasing momentum of the internet.

Running this space has been by turns liberating and confining, enjoyable and exhausting, rewarding and punishing, thrilling and stress-inducing, inspiring and scary.

I am still in shock that you are out there, reading along!  Thank you for sharing your time with me here, for opening up your minds and hearts, for reaching out to commune with me over the issues and topics that I have raised.  Thank you for your friendship, your loyalty, your concern, your passion, your questions, your honesty, your love.  I started a blog and you people made it a community -- and for that I am eternally grateful.

I have been thinking about this for a long time (and recent events have conspired to confirm my inclination): I think it is time to say goodbye.

The Marvelous Kiddo chapter of my life is over.

I am crying as I write this, not because I regret this decision but because I know it is truly time to move on, and moving on can be hard!  I am venturing into the unknown, opening up to possibility, surrendering to the loss of something that has meant so very much for so long.  But I cannot make this work any longer.  I'm ready to discover what is next, and (perhaps moreover) to fully enjoy just being in the now.

Please accept my deepest regards and my most heartfelt appreciation for being a part of this blogging journey with me.

All my love.

Leigh

a way to help

Hi, dear readers.  My, what a week.  Thank you so much for the emails and comments.  I want to assure everyone that our family is safe and our home fine in the wake of the hurricane.  Our neighborhood is still without electricity, but we are incredibly fortunate to be staying nearby at the home of a family member so we are all warm and fed and bathed. The main reason that it has taken me so long to post is that have actually been experiencing some health problems of late (unrelated to the weather!) and I have been trying to focus on resting and healing.  Just so you know, I will be taking a break from blogging  indefinitely while I recover.

But before I go, I have to say my heart is breaking for the multitudes of people not as fortunate as us, who are suffering so greatly and experiencing profound loss and trauma because of Sandy.  There is not much I can do to physically help, but I know that one incredibly easy and productive way to make a difference is to donate funds to the relief effort.  If you too are interested in helping out in this way, you will be excited to know that Sakura Bloom is spearheading a three-day fundraiser to benefit the storm victims.

Three slings from the Luxe Collection are being raffled, and the winners will be free to choose their favorite colorway.

Tickets are available for purchase by clicking here. The more you give, the more chances there are to win: $10 will get you one ticket, $25 will get you five tickets, $50 will get you twenty tickets, and $100 will get you fifty tickets.

100% of proceeds from this fundraiser will be donated to the Red Cross.

Thank you so much for your generosity.  Leave a comment here letting me know how you are doing.  I've been worried about so many friends and readers who have been affected by Sandy.  I'm sending you my thoughts and prayers :)