
This week's story was sent in by Kattie Jones, and I think it serves as a great illustration of the value of researching and evaluating different birth options to find the environment that will work best for you and your baby. Thanks for sharing, Kattie! -- Leigh
When I became pregnant with my second daughter I was very worried that my experience would be the same and that coupled with adjusting to having two children would put me over the edge. I initially planned to deliver at local hospital with a midwife group but after a trip to triage as well as watching my friend give birth in that very hospital I started to feel like a hospital birth just wasn’t the experience that I wanted. I then watched “The Business of Being Born” that cemented that I didn’t want another hospital birth. What I wanted was for the person who delivered me to know ME and to care about me and my child and to not feel like a number. I also really wanted to know the person who delivered me and I wanted to have a natural child birth in a calm, peaceful environment. It took me awhile to make my decision but at 30 weeks I switched my care to a much smaller midwife group at a birth center and I am so very glad that I did.
I was due on September 14th but I went overdue. On September 19th I went in to see my midwife at about 2pm. She did a stretch and sweep to see if we could get things going but we scheduled me to come back in at 7pm that night to break my water since I was 5 days overdue and the baby was low enough. I went back home and my older daughter and I walked around our neighborhood about 5 times to see if we could get things going. I was starting to feel a little crampy but nothing crazy was going on so we went in to pack her bag so she would be ready for her stay at Auntie and house for the weekend. I did a bunch of last minute cleaning and chores and then my Mom got to my house so she could stay with my daughter until my sister arrived. My husband, Greg, got home around 6:15 so he got ready, ate some dinner and we took off.
When we got to the birth center they were lighting candles and getting the room ready. It was so peaceful and calming. At about 7:20 they broke my water and things started moving along pretty quickly. I was able to work through the first part of the contractions pretty well by sitting on the exercise ball and using one of the candles as a focal point. I had put together good playlist and Greg made me some CD's so listening to the music really helped me to concentrate as well as Greg applying counter pressure on my lower back. My Mom arrived at about 8:30 and did whatever she could to help me feel comfortable. I went through those manageable contractions until about 9pm then they got more intense and it was a little harder to remain calm. I stayed in that position until about 10 o'clock when I got into the Jacuzzi tub. The tub felt great but I was still in some major pain. Greg was awesome coaching me through each contraction and my Mom was applying cold wash cloths to my face, neck and back depending on what position I was in. By around 10:30 I was not a happy camper and began begging for an epidural even thought I knew I didn’t want one. My midwife informed me that my statement probably meant that I was ready to push so I tried to do so through my next contraction but I just couldn't get into the right position in the tub so I decided to get out and got on the birthing stool.
I cannot begin to describe the kind of pain I was in at this point. I was caught between being in so much pain that I just wanted the baby out and being afraid to push because of the pain. I pushed through about 3 contractions and felt like I wasn't getting anywhere but I was able to push her to crown pretty quickly. I promptly pushed her head out and felt a sense of relief until I was told that I still had to push her shoulders out. At this point, I started yelling at everyone around me to just take her out because I thought I could not do it. Greg just kept trying to encourage me and let me know that she was right there and that she was so pretty. He was so cute....already in love with her before she was fully born! Obviously, I made it past that point and pushed her out with the next contraction. She was born at 11:16 pm after 4 hours of labor. I looked at her and instantly fell in love.
Once I delivered her they handed her right to me and she didn't make a peep as I held her. She just hung out and got used to being in a new place. I think that my midwife was a bit concerned that she wasn't making any noise but as soon as Greg cut the cord and I handed her off she let out a huge wail. I delivered the placenta then somehow made it over to the bed where I just sat absolutely zoned out for about 30 minutes. When I finally had the strength to speak and actually hold her Greg brought her over to me and she began nursing like a champ! We hung out at the birth center for about 3 hours while they checked out the baby and watched me. It was so nice to sit in a comfortable bed without all the poking and prodding and just get to know my new baby. At about 2:30 am we left and headed home. It was so great to spend our first night in our own bed with no one to bother us! Even as she woke up through the night I felt this sense of calm knowing that I was at home and that I could provide her with all she needed.
My birth center experience was all that I imagined and more. I had a wonderful, short labor and I bonded with my daughter immediately. I had zero PPD and I adjusted very well to having two children. I really feel that my incredible birth played a huge role in this wonderful transition and I am so grateful that I had enough faith in myself to make the leap from the traditional hospital birth to an “unconventional” birth center birth.


lovely story. I'm really enjoying your featured "Birth Story of the Week" posts
ReplyDeleteI love your "birth story of the week" posts, it gives me so much to think about!
ReplyDeleteAbsolutely beautiful. Whenever I get scared about giving birth I am reminded that it is what I was created for. Way to go homebirthing mamas!
ReplyDeletevery nice story! <3
ReplyDeletelove love love this story.
ReplyDeletelovely. so glad kattie had the birth experience she was longing for ... and got to experience falling in love right away!
ReplyDeleteI have found reading this blog such a healing and positive experience, it has lead to me and my partner talking about our experiences of my birth and lead us to decide that we will have home births with any further children.
ReplyDeleteI was induced after my waters broke, I spent the night on a ward alone with no heating (it was January!) really cold and missing my other half-we never spend a night apart. We had decided on a hospital birth as we thought this would be the safest and most sensible option.
The ward I was on was completely understaffed and had a shortage of beds, my oh kept ringing the alarm as I was in such pain and we kept getting the midwife's assistant (in the UK they are similar to healthcare assistants not as qualified as nurses), no one checked how far my labour was progressing I was told to stop making so much fuss take some paracetamol and have a bath.
My other half ran me a bath in a horrible dingy bathroom, I said to him earlier today that I did find the bath a relief but I couldnt relax as I was so terrified and no one came to check on me while I was in there! He has said since that he was terrified too. I suddenly had a wave of complete helplessness and exhaustion-I started screaming and crying and saying that I was too tired and needed to sleep and that I couldnt take anymore. (I'd been labouring for about 4 hours) The midwife finally arrived and examined me and told me I was halfway there. I was taken down to the labour ward and the midwife came into the room introduced herself before dashing out again (probably to see to another lady I think the ratio was 1:3) while she was out of the room I felt a great deal of pressure and remember putting my hand down and it being covered in blood, my other half was beside himself as there was no one to reassure him, I started pushing.
The midwife came into the room saw that I was pushing, hit the alarm and pulled me from my kneeling position to flat on my back, I gave birth in 10 minutes and nearly fainted.
I spent another sleepless night in hospital so upset that they were keeping me in and that I was spending another night away from my other half.
During my labour I just felt like an inconvenience, that I was making too much of a fuss. I received no compassion and no option of pain relief. My daughter is happy and healthy and a joy to us both but I honestly believe that my stressful birth experience delayed my bonding with her, for months after her birth I felt like I was in shock.
If we have any more children I feel like I will take power and control of my own body and birth experience.
Kattie, your two birth experiences sounded very similar to mine!
ReplyDeleteI had my first daughter in a hospital, attended by OB.
I had my second daughter at a birth center, attended by a midwife. My second labor was short...and we were able to go home and sleep in our bed that very night! I still have the fondest memories of that experience.
My husband and I often talk about how our birth center experience was a thousand times better than our hospital experience. More than a thousand times, really...
stephanie@metropolitanmama.net